Warriors don’t wear floral wedgies.
Otis is a very wiggly dog. He does not like to cuddle very much. But bribery will get you everywhere. He cannot resist a Greenie. That will get you about a 10 minute cuddle. 12, if you give him belly scratches.
I’ve been getting questions about how I’m doing. People always notice when I don’t post as much original stuff. They know it usually means I don’t feel great. Which is kind of a nice feeling because it makes me feel like people care about me beyond the funny things I do.
I’m in a weird state. I have definitely felt worse. My depression is pretty tolerable with the new medication. But I’m just physically fatigued. I have all this stuff I want to accomplish, but I just don’t have the energy to do any of it. It’s been like this for four weeks.
Logically I know I’ll get better. Because I always have. But that irrational part of my brain likes to whisper things like, “What if you never feel better than this? You’d be pretty screwed. What if you die before you touch another boob? What if JJ Abrams screws up Star Wars? What if your foot falls off and Otis eats it before they can reattach it? What if sprinkles are actually clown poop?”
That part of my brain can get really weird. I don’t know why I listen to it. But it sounds convincing in the moment.
Would you rather piss through your nose, or smell with your dick?
this is a fridge, you put your shit in the gel and it keeps it cool, than you just reach in and take it out. the gel automatically reforms.
what happens if someone falls in
then they freeze and 1000 years passes and they fall out and get a cyclops for a girlfriend
stop this is too much
Can you imagine how disgustingly dirty that gel would get.
Like, from an engineering standpoint I love this. It’s just so cool that these sorts of things are being made.
But practically, think about the gunk and shit that ends up in your fridge after a while.
Now think about mixing that gunk with a transparent gel, and suspending it on your wall.
And then keeping the rest of your food in that gel, and having to stick your hand into it any time you wanted a snack.
On the other hand, it could be a very effective way of controlling my snacking urges.
I mean, I’d REALLY have to want to eat something.
I would just crawl in it and pretend to be Han Solo in carbonite.
oh my god
is the most